Day 33

Mileage: 105
Total mileage: 2931

All references to Yellowstone will be replaced with the word Disneyland. The analogy is pretty accurate.

So you'd think I would have my nighttime routine all figured out now and wouldn't make silly mistakes anymore. Nope! Last night I did laundry in the bathroom sink and laid my clothes outside to dry. This morning they were freezing cold and wet with dew. Fortunately there was an easy fix. I was about to put on my chilly clothes when I realized I was in a town. So I threw them in the dryer at a laundromat while I ate breakfast and put them on while they were still warm. Booya!

Since I've spent so much time complaining about the wind for the past few days, I feel obligated to mention that today was actually pretty nice. The morning started out a bit rough, but once I had climbed a bit into the mountains, it died down and went away.

The first three hours of the day consisted of a 30 mile, 2600 foot climb up to Togwotee Pass. At the top, there was a sign warning truckers about a steep 17 mile descent. Sweet! It was nothing crazy, but at least I didn't have to use my legs too much for the next hour as I shot down towards Grand Teton National Park.

Then it was into the parks. First, I wound my way through Teton with some gorgeous views. It was getting to be near early afternoon and I was getting hungry, so I stopped at the only place for a while, which happened to be a resort. I was so out of place, walking in my sweaty jersey with dried salt crystals in my eyebrows while everyone else was dressed like rich people on vacation. I took one look at the lunch menu prices and decided I could make the 10 mile ride to a grocery store. While I was getting water, a nice guy named Mark came up and started asking me where I was riding from. We got to talking and eventually he sat me down at the bar and bought me lunch and a beer. It was an enjoyable break and I was there for well over an hour. He gave me crap for eating marshmallows while I was waiting for the food to come, but I've got to pack down those calories somehow!

After lunch, a few more miles took me out of Teton and into Rockefeller parkway which I rode through until I got to the south entrance of Disneyland. I had to wait in line a few minutes to snag my picture with the sign. From there it just got more exciting.

As I entered the park, the ranger ominously warned me that the dents in the guardrails aren't from trees and rocks and that I should ride carefully. He wasn't kidding.

Apparently the south entrance road is one of those no shoulder deals that I love so much. After a few close calls with vehicles passing in lane while traffic was coming the opposite way, I realized that I had to go back to playing crossing guard like I did on that stretch of construction in Colorado. For the next 2 hours, I was absolutely wired, taking up the middle of the lane, but also constantly watching behind me so I could get out of the way if a car didn't see me and slow down. When there was traffic in the opposite lane, I would gate the one or two cars behind me until it was clear to pass, then get to the side and motion them around in a wide arc. I hate doing that. After a few dozen cars, the constant hyper focused attention starts to wear you down. After a few hundred, you just desperately want to have a shoulder so you can safely mind your own business. It went on for 22 miles and an uncountable number of cars before I finally got to Grant village.

There were a few pretty spots on the way in. You follow the Louis river upstream from a narrow canyon all the way to where it's a peaceful stream flowing through grasslands. At one point it crosses the road and then turns into a waterfall. I could tell whenever a pretty view was coming up because there would be two dozen cars parked in the lot designated for that specific vista, a sign directing you to the turnoff and 50 people milling around the area. Disneyland. I chose to forego most of the picture spots. Views seem to be really pretty when you stumble upon them and less exciting when they're handed to you on a well marked platter.

In Grant village the campground was full, the hiker biker lot wasn't open and the visitors center was closed. I thought about riding a few miles up the road and camping a few hundred yards off trail, but that sounds like the introduction to a 'stupid tourist in Yellowstone' joke. There looked to be a nice covered porch outside the visitors center where I decided to sleep for the night. Satisfied that I had a spot, I headed to the restaurant.

On my way, I saw a moose grazing near a thicket. I wasn't fooled by his vegetarian ploy and kept my distance. No meat for this moose tonight.

At the restaurant, they asked if I had a reservation. Apparently this was THAT kind of restaurant. I didn't have one, so I put my name in and went to wait at the bar for an hour. Fortunately, the time went quickly since there were two pretty girls already sitting at the bar. I had changed into my normal clothes and washed up in the bathroom so I felt presentable enough to introduce myself. They were servers at the restaurant who were off duty. Apparently there's a huge corporation that hires tons of college age kids to come out and work all the restaurants, stores and resorts in the park every summer. They knew all the restaurant employees and introduced me to the bartender, his roommate and a bunch of the servers. Eventually I got seated for my meal and said goodbye, but halfway through my mashed potatoes and steak one of the girls came over to my table and told me to come back when I was done eating. I obliged and when I returned they told me that the park rangers are really diligent about patrolling the buildings and that they would probably find me and make me move in the middle of the night. Instead, they said I should come hang out at the employee lodging for the night.

The bartender's roommate Greg drove me over to the off limits area where there was a huge mess hall, recreation area, pub, cabins and like 200 people my age hanging out. One of the guys there offered to let me sleep on his floor tonight, so I'm over at his cabin sleeping inside!

Tomorrow I'm getting up early so that I can hopefully escape the park before tourist traffic gets huge again. I don't think I can do 50 more miles of that kind of riding, but I also don't want to get smashed on the shoulder by a careless RV driver. Beat the traffic, that's the plan! G'night!